Monday, October 31, 2011

Birth Story v2

It was a dark and stormy night when there arose a cry from a nearby house. Not one of panic, but of pain as the baby decided that it was time for him to enter the world. After consulting with her husband they set off for the local delivery place. After many hours of trying labor the baby sprang forth to peals of thunder and flashes of lightning.

Who knew that is how mummies spring forth.

Friday, October 28, 2011

Carving Pupmkins

Carving a pumpkin can always be a fun endevour. But before you begin you need to gather up the tools that you will need.

Besides the obvious need of a pumpkin you will need a knife, a pattern, and a drill.

After carving an opening in the top get your young children to make a mess with the insides. As they have a natural proclivity of making messes then this task should be quite enjoyable for them.

Once the innards have been removed then you need to apply the pattern to the pumpkin. Duct Tape works quite well for this. Then poke along the edges with a sharp metal implement of your choosing. In this case I used a fondue fork, which unfortunately became a casualty of the evening.

Once you have sketched out the pattern then proceed to carve it using either a knife or your drill. The knife will get the job done but is slower and more boring than using a drill.

Once you have completed your drawing then stick a candle inside and then light it. You could light the candle before placing it inside the pumpkin but I hold no responsibility for fires that may occur. Then get your wife who is a Photographer to take some "night" shots for the full effect.

Once you have completed the pumpkin then kick back and enjoy some yummy publix pumpkin ice cream.

Thursday, October 27, 2011

My son is a what????

My Wife: The girls sounded like dragons at birth, This one sounds like a billy goat.

Wednesday, October 26, 2011

Future Profession: Arborist

I decided to put Aeralind in a tree and she liked it very muchly. I think if she had the chance, she would have climbed higher. Future profession choice maybe?

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Pumpkins and Suitors

Derek, Derek pumpkin eater,
Had two girls and couldn't guard them.
So he stuffed them in a pumpkin shell,
And there he kept them very well.

This should keep them safe from suitors.

Saturday, October 22, 2011

Pink Retaliates

Members of Team pink did a sneak attack this morning. First, they drugged mommy so she was sleeping. Once daddy went outside to check the temperature they quickly locked him outside of the house. Once he was locked out they proceeded to go downstairs and try to dump water on their Father's computer.

Unfortunately for team Pink they failed to remove the spare key outside and their attack was defeated by me.

Thursday, October 20, 2011

We have Victory!!!!!!!!!!

Yesterday at 3:50 pm we received word that Team Blue would be acquiring much needed reinforcements in this war against pink. Sedryn Justice Colton Aldrich decided to grace us with his presence when he was least expected. With no nurses/doctors in the room he started coming and it not for the quick fingers of the first nurse in there he would have plopped head first onto the bed. He was a big baby weighing in at 8lbs 11oz and 21.5 inches long.

Tuesday, October 18, 2011

Lions in the Park

My daughters apparently have a penchant for seeing the strangest things in the oddest places. Most recently there has been an influx of lions at our nearby park.

I think it is a dog... but apparently they know better.

Monday, October 17, 2011

What's for Dinner?

The only thing worse than suitors is a band of hungry orcs when my sweet hobbit maidens are running around in the back yard. Thankfully it seems we were able to rescue her from the pot of doom before anything to bad happened.

Sunday, October 16, 2011

The girls were doing what?

Melissa: The girls are wrestling right now.
Melissa: Aeralind is now on top of B touching her owls.
Me: umm.....

The girls before their knockdown, drag out fight.

Saturday, October 15, 2011

I am a DADD

Someone linked this shirt to me. I think it sums up my thoughts perfectly.

You can buy it here.

Friday, October 14, 2011

Retro girls

For their birthday the girls were given a whole slew of head bands and sun glasses. They promptly decided to model them for us in their best imitation of the style from the 70's. I think this should also keep them safe from silly boys.

Thursday, October 13, 2011

On the use of Bears

As the father of young girls I must always be on the lookout for ways to improve or modify my suitor defense plan. While at a recent visit to the park my daughters found the perfect creature for a job opening in my suitor defense plan. They were laying innocently in the grass waiting for some unsuspecting person to walk by. But when my daughters approached them, the bears let them go for a ride on their backs.

I think that they will be a nice addition to my suitor defense plan. The girls can have a fun pet to play with while any boys will be met with a fierce predator.

I was even able to get a picture of all my women riding the bear.

Saturday, October 8, 2011


I think the girls have a thing for tomatoes. What say you?

Tuesday, October 4, 2011

Mysterious White Powder

I came home from work today and upon entering the bathroom, I was greeted by this site on the floor.

This spawned the following conversation with my wife:

Me: Should I be concerned about the white powdery stuff on the floor?
Wife: Oh..... I've been trying to hide the girls cocaine habit, but now you know. (It's baking soda)